In the past, I’ve touched on my relationship with HSP resilience. I was born with a special connection with it, which I believe gave me the tools I needed growing up in a house challenged by my parents’ struggles with addiction and mental illness. In fact I have real memories as my small child self, quietly singing the “Weebles” jingle, “Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down” over and over on a constant loop. Looking back, I think I was subconsciously imploring myself to stay standing.
My devotion to helping Highly Sensitive People build resilience is deeply personal and foundational to my being. And as every sensitive soul becomes more and more overwhelmed by our world’s realities, I walk my own fine line of bearing intense responsibility for the energy I’m putting out into the world on every platform. I don’t want to pretend that I’m not affected by all of it, just as you are. But my dharma is to devote my time and energy to filling your energy reserves, not being one more source that drains it.
Today I’d love to share a very simple priority list, a blueprint for keeping yourself in a resourceful place as a highly sensitive member of this global humanity.
Remember to protect your well being at all cost, because only from a place of energy surplus can you be of assistance to anyone else. And if you’re getting pulled into the abyss of helplessness and overwhelm, please turn off all media for 48-72 hours, and nurture yourself. Sometimes you need an energy reset.
A Blueprint for HSP Resilience ~
For your body/ mind/ soul health, please use this list as your self-care guide:
1.) Accept that “gravity problems” (the circumstances that cannot be altered or changed) are not yours to fix. Redirect your mind to focus on the things you can influence.
2.) Talk to somebody regularly about the complex emotions you’re stewing in (a therapist or transformational coach). Remember not to emotion dump on your partner, friends, or loved ones. They’re working through their own complex issues as human beings on this planet earth. Talk to them. Freely and honestly express your emotions, yes. But know the difference between a give and take of honest expression (healthy venting), and being a one-sided category F5 tornado of doom, despair, and total destruction (emotional dumping). I’m working with a lot of people right now who are feeling buried by the pressure of holding space for loved ones, without receiving any support in return. (If you’re unsure about this, please Google “What is emotional dumping?” It’s a boundary issue, and boundaries are a skill HSP’s often have trouble with.)
3.) Don’t be afraid to reframe. It’s not spiritual bypass to look for where this situation is opening your heart. If a certain world tragedy is actually guiding you to be a better human, then feel free to use that perspective to fuel your useful action back into the world.
4.) Identify and honor your needs. What does your mind need? What does your body need? What does your spirit need? Ask yourself these questions frequently, as the answers will change rapidly.
5.) Choose one or two action steps. If you’re feeling helpless, I can assure you you’re not. Remind yourself how much good one person can do by focusing your energy on solution-finding, and positive action. Keep a journal that documents the small or large steps you take every day to make this world what you perceive to be a kinder place. Over time it will become a potent reminder–direct evidence–for the power of your own resilience.
6.) Create structure around your mental wellness. Following this list is creating structure. Blocking off time on your calendar for daily meditation is structure. Scheduling regular acupuncture appointments is structure. Solidify your commitment to your own mental health: Make it non-negotiable and prioritize it.
7.) Be super, incredibly, unrelentingly loving to yourself. You cannot bear the everyday emotional burdens of the world and also beat yourself up over every little perceived error. Self-Love, for those with a persistent inner critic, is a long, arduous journey that requires consistency and diligence, mainly around re-training our minds to not follow the path of least resistance (which for some is shame, blame, & self-directed cruelty). The first step is to increase awareness around, and take responsibility for, our self-talk. When we hear that old destructive pattern kick in, we have to say “Stop” in order to redirect our brain.
8.) As always, seek strength. But know that you will not feel strong every day–you’re not supposed to. Like every other human being on the planet, you are allowed to have your share of curl-up-in-the-fetal-position days. You’re allowed to feel the opposite of strong every now and then, and you can decide to completely turn the world off if you’re able.
I know that you are making the world a better place every day.
I know how hard you’re trying, how deeply you care, and how truly amazing you are. I know you’re devoted to learning more about your own, or your loved one’s HSP resilience.
Please let me know how you’re doing, by simply responding in the comments.
Much Love,
Kristy
P.S. ~ For a little deeper dive into HSP Resilience, read more here.
Thank you so much Kristy for sharing this. It is exactly what I needed at this point. I think reading this every day for a week would help me a lot. I have been struggling and this reminded me to accept That everyone does amd its ok. You are amazing and I am grateful to have met you.
Jeannine I am so thrilled that you found this message useful at a time when you truly needed to hear it. You are amazing, and precious to me. And I too am SO grateful that we get to walk this journey of life together.